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| 21 Weeks! |
Different pregnancy symptoms have started to emerge over the last week!
Pregnancy Symptoms
The round ligament pain seems to have eased off temporarily, though it wouldn't surprise me if it came back before too long. It may be that some of the stretches I have to do in my birthing classes are helping that out. There is some occasional lower back pain, but that too could be related to some exercises that I'm doing for the class.
I've noticed that it's getting much harder to change sleeping positions at night, because my belly feels large and heavy! This will certainly increase the further along I get in the pregnancy, since my belly is just going to keep getting bigger. It hasn't been a problem so far, but it takes me way longer to roll from one side to the other than I am used to. At least I have lovely baby kicks to amuse me until I find a comfortable spot!
I also can't bend at the waist at all after eating a meal and if I stand up straight, I can't see my toes because my baby bump sticks out so far! That's not an issue for me though, because it means Baby Girl is still in there and still growing. From time to time, my belly will bump into something or press buttons accidentally. I have a feeling this will just become more common, too! Though it could be my imagination, I feel so much bigger at 21 weeks with this baby than at 23 weeks with Adelyn Jane!
One more thing that is different from last week is that my skin is starting to get very tight. I don't believe it's possible to prevent stretch marks (and that whether or not you get them is based on the natural elasticity of your skin), but I've been trying to keep plenty of homemade lotion on there so I don't get itchy. If I press my fingers into my abdomen, they don't really go anywhere, so it won't surprise me if I get some stretch marks in the coming weeks! Fortunately, the thought of my skin scarring from a growing baby bump doesn't upset me in the least. I see it as a medal of honor that marks my "mom status." When I was pregnant with Addie, I didn't get any because she was born too early. Rather than having the scars as a memory of my first pregnancy it was as if the entire thing hadn't happened at all, which was way worse to me than having scarred skin. Hopefully this time I'll get those beautiful belly marks to go along with the memories of this pregnancy!
A Few Thoughts
Wednesday was the 20 week anatomy scan. During that time, the technician carefully examined Baby Girl to check on her heart, brain, kidneys, and other important organs to make sure everything was working properly. They also checked for any physical abnormalities, took measurements (which I forgot to ask about), and checked the amniotic fluid levels. Everything looked great!
The appointment drew my thoughts to situations in which some babies are not healthy - or perhaps "typical". It seems to me that so many people are terrified by the possibility that their child could be born with a physical or mental handicap. Though I understand their desire for a healthy child, I believe those situations are nothing to be afraid of - or upset by if they should actually arise. Before I continue sharing my perspective, I'd like to say that I'm not talking about babies who are born with severe health problems that cause their lives to be cut short unexpectedly within hours of their births. Nor am I talking about the babies whose medical conditions cause them to be ill or in serious pain for most of their lives. These are all things to be concerned about. I'm merely referring to babies who are born with special needs or physical abnormalities. Here's what I believe about these (and all) children: they are uniquely created by God just like everyone else, and they have a vital role to play in His plans. Their significance in light of eternity isn't forfeited just because they are born different from others; in fact, I think God uses these special children in ways that other children cannot be used to accomplish His purpose. We see parts of God and His heart that we wouldn't normally get to see reflected in the faces and lives children with disabilities or handicaps. If God were to give me a child who was "different" for any reason, I would consider myself to be richly blessed. I've always thought that God calls and equips the parents of children with physical abnormalities or mental challenges in ways that He doesn't with other believers. He trusts them with much, and I believe that if they trust Him with what they have been given in return, He will use them and their wonderful children to impact the lives of others in powerful ways. The world is a better place with these children in it, I think it's abominable that unborn children who "might" end up dealing with one or more of these issues frequently have their lives cut short by parents who deceive themselves into believing they are being merciful by sparing them from hardship. I don't mean to rant, especially about things I haven't experienced and don't fully understand. But in my limited knowledge I am certain that, as Dr. Denmark championed in her lifetime, every child deserves a chance. God is loving, and He extends His grace to all of us because we have all fallen short and are in need of His forgiveness. If you are struggling with fear about your unborn child's health, let me encourage you and remind you that God is in control of all things. He sees your child's future, and if you trust Him - whether it ends well or not - that child will bless your life in ways you could never have imagined!
"Some people were even bringing infants to Him so He might touch them, but when the disciples saw it, they rebuked them. Jesus, however, invited them: 'Let the little children come to Me, and don't stop them, because the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I assure you: Whoever does not welcome the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.'" -Luke 18:15-17
If you're reading this, and you were born with some kind of physical or mental challenges, know that there is nothing wrong with you. Society may not see your worth, but you are priceless to the God who formed you in the womb personally and with great joy. Don't allow the enemy to discourage you into thinking you aren't enough, that there's something "wrong" with you, or that God cannot use you because of the ways you are different. You've been fearfully and wonderfully made by a Creator who knew you before you were formed (Psalm 139:13-16).
Two weeks from now, I'll be where I was in the pregnancy when Addie joined and left us. I'm not worried about that day at all, but I am curious about how it will effect me. Sometimes when you think something won't make you sad, it does; and sometimes it's the other way around. Based on how well my checkups have been going, I don't expect any problems to arise. I think that 23rd week will come and go quickly, and a few short weeks after that we'll be going in to have the cerclage removed. But even if things don't go as planned (which is always a possibility), I know that God is working all things together for good. Things don't always go the way we think they should, but God never abandons us. He is always good, even when our circumstances aren't.
Thank you, Lord!
"But as for me, God's presence is my good. I have made the Lord God my refuge, so I can tell about all You do." -Psalm 73:28
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