Fatigue: Moderate to Strong
Although I experienced lots of fatigue when I was pregnant with Adelyn, G and I both think that it has been much more intense this time. The progesterone pills I'm having to take list dizziness and drowsiness as some of the side-effects, so that could have something to do with it. Whatever the cause, I often feel like I could sleep all day long, and taking a nap doesn't determine how much I sleep at night. Today is the first day that I haven't felt exhausted, so maybe things are starting to improve.
Food Aversions: Very Strong
Last time, I had lots of food aversions, but smells didn't seem to bother me much. There were also a few things that I could eat without any problems. This time, smells of all kinds turn my stomach. Anything that smells strong - from greasy food to scented candles - sends me running from the room. Even smells I used to like are unbearable now! As far as food is concerned, there is very little that sounds good to me. And if I do manage to find something edible, I will only get a few bites down before I have to stop eating or switch to a different food. Sometimes a certain food will sound good, and the moment it's placed in front of me, my stomach starts to churn with displeasure. It's all part of the pregnancy process, but it can be very frustrating. Thankfully, there's a diner close to our house that is open 24/7/365 (no joke, and it's a pregnant lady's dream!), and we discovered that you can call in and place take out orders! Yesterday, I wanted some of their matzoh ball soup, so G picked up several things for me. It was the first meal I was able to eat a significant amount of in weeks! Today was my best day for eating so far, and if you know me, you know how exciting that is. Anyway, I have noticed that anything with a strong flavor or lots of seasonings really unsettles my stomach, so I'm trying to stay away from ethnic food until my eating gets better.
Cravings: Low to None
I didn't have many cravings at this point when I was pregnant with Addie, and it seems that is true for this pregnancy as well. There have been very few things that have sounded good to me, but a few things I have felt like eating have been a bean burrito from Taco Bell (gross, I know), potatoes and gravy from KFC (also gross, and I haven't had this yet), and of course, the matzoh ball soup. None of these things - except for the soup - have been "cravings," just things that haven't sounded awful. Although I normally eat very healthy, organic foods, I've noticed that I only crave junk when I'm pregnant. And if I eat it, I always regret it. Those "foods" just don't taste like they did when I was a child, and it's probably because my body loves healthy food now. I'm curious to see what foods I crave over the next few months. Please be fruits and veggies!
Nausea: Mild to Moderate
This is a new symptom for me, since I didn't experience morning sickness last time. Early on, I just felt mildly nauseated a couple of times a week. Now I feel nauseated every day, for at least a little while. There were a few days where I felt very strong nausea, and if I don't eat for several hours, it comes on very quickly. I haven't actually gotten sick yet, and I'm hoping that won't happen. Although with the moderate nausea, I would rather get it over with and feel better. Today, things have been significantly better. Although there were a few moments of mild nausea, I haven't felt this good in weeks!
Other Symptoms:
- The bleeding from the hemorrhage has stopped completely now.
- I had a lot of acne outbreaks on my face for several weeks, but those have significantly decreased over the last few days.
- I felt pretty achey all over on a few random days, but that seems to have improved as well.
A Few Thoughts
There have been times where I was tempted to be fearful about the future and discouraged because things haven't gone the way that I expected them to, but then I remember Who holds our future (and that of our baby). This has been a hard year for lots of people, including me and G, but God has not abandoned us in our struggles and heartaches. The future is uncertain, but the Lord is still on the throne. God doesn't always give me what I want, and it doesn't always feel pleasant. I don't always understand why or how things happen the way they do, but I do know that God uses all circumstances for good. I think oftentimes, the trials that we face in life - both big and small - have a much bigger purpose than we can understand. So whether I give the child in my womb back to Him earlier than I expect to (like with Addie), or I carry to term and give birth to a healthy baby, I trust Him. He's good all the time, and that truth is not dependent on my level of understanding about the situation. We're going to face lots of difficult things over the next year. It's going to be hard when we hear this baby's heartbeat for the first time, because my mind will go back to the first time we heard Addie's. We will struggle on January 15th, because that was Addie's due date. It will be bittersweet when we find out the sex, because the memories of that 20 week ultrasound - the special day we named our first child Adelyn Jane - will come rushing back. And if I reach and pass my 23rd week of pregnancy with this baby, there will be pain as we remember what happened at that point with Addie. G's birthday (as well as Adelyn's, which was the next day) will always have those painful memories attached to it. Yet look at the beautiful words of God that we can cling to in those hard times:
There have been times where I was tempted to be fearful about the future and discouraged because things haven't gone the way that I expected them to, but then I remember Who holds our future (and that of our baby). This has been a hard year for lots of people, including me and G, but God has not abandoned us in our struggles and heartaches. The future is uncertain, but the Lord is still on the throne. God doesn't always give me what I want, and it doesn't always feel pleasant. I don't always understand why or how things happen the way they do, but I do know that God uses all circumstances for good. I think oftentimes, the trials that we face in life - both big and small - have a much bigger purpose than we can understand. So whether I give the child in my womb back to Him earlier than I expect to (like with Addie), or I carry to term and give birth to a healthy baby, I trust Him. He's good all the time, and that truth is not dependent on my level of understanding about the situation. We're going to face lots of difficult things over the next year. It's going to be hard when we hear this baby's heartbeat for the first time, because my mind will go back to the first time we heard Addie's. We will struggle on January 15th, because that was Addie's due date. It will be bittersweet when we find out the sex, because the memories of that 20 week ultrasound - the special day we named our first child Adelyn Jane - will come rushing back. And if I reach and pass my 23rd week of pregnancy with this baby, there will be pain as we remember what happened at that point with Addie. G's birthday (as well as Adelyn's, which was the next day) will always have those painful memories attached to it. Yet look at the beautiful words of God that we can cling to in those hard times:
"Those who sow in tears will reap with shouts of joy." -Psalm 126:5
"Youths may faint and grow weary, and young men stumble and fall, but those who trust in the Lord will renew their strength; they will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary; they will walk and not faint." -Isaiah 40:30-31"
"Blessed are the poor in spirit, because the kingdom of heaven is theirs. Blessed are those who mourn, because they will be comforted." -Matthew 5:3-4
"We are pressured in every way but not crushed; we are perplexed but not in despair; we are persecuted but not abandoned; we are struck down but not destroyed. We always carry the death of Jesus in our body, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who live are always given over to death because of Jesus, so that Jesus' life may also be revealed in our mortal flesh...Therefore we do not give up; even though our outer person is being destroyed, our inner person is being renewed day by day. For our momentary light affliction is producing for us an absolutely incomparable eternal weight of glory. So we do not focus on what is seen, but on what is unseen; for what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. -2 Corinthians 4:8-11, 16-18
"So we must not get tired of doing good, for we will reap at the proper time if we don't give up." -Galatians 6:9
"I am sure of this, that He who started a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." -Philippians 1:6
"Consider it a great joy, my brothers, whenever you experience various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. But endurance must do its complete work, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing." -James 1:2-4
No matter what troubles you may have faced so far, or what troubles are yet to come, know that there is always a purpose for your pain. You alone must decide whether you will let your circumstances define you or refine you. Trust in the Lord, friend, and have faith. He loves you so much, and He's not finished with you yet!
Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year!
No comments:
Post a Comment